I bought a flat: here's how it went (or the trauma of it all)

There comes a point in everyone's life when the big questions start piling up: Intel or AMD? Mac or PC? Keep paying rent, or buy a place?

I bought a place.

Come along on this little adventure while I explain how I pulled it off... and all the bureaucracy that came with it, which was no small thing.

Step one: find a flat. Where? The same places as everyone else, property portals, agencies, endless Googling. You'll tour about ten flats before you finally hit one and go "oh, I actually like this one." Then they tell you the price. And you weep.

A few tips for when you're viewing a place to buy:

• Look at everything on show, and everything that isn't. Open the wardrobes, the doors, the kitchen cupboards. Open the oven and the dishwasher too, if there are any.
• Check whether there are squatters in the building, and more importantly, how easy it would be for one to get in.
• If it comes with a parking space, ask the agent to let you actually park your car, so you know whether it's a nightmare or not.
• If you spot a neighbour, corner them and grill them about the building: what the neighbours are like, noise levels, any trouble in the area.

Once you finally find a flat you love and can afford, that's when the real fun begins. But first... what does "being able to afford a flat" even mean? Because all that glitters is not gold. In this case it's mountains of paperwork dressed up as gold.

First, you sign the deposit agreement (the contrato de arras). What's that? A kind of "earnest money" where you commit to buying the flat unless the bank turns you down. Depending on where you do it, that can run to 10% of the property's value. You sign, you pay, they hand you a receipt.

Next, off to the bank. Go with the deposit already sorted so you're negotiating from a position of strength. The question is... how much do you actually need?

You have to put down 20% of the flat's value in cash. If it costs €100,000, you need €20,000 to get the mortgage approved (or €10,000 if you've already paid the 10% deposit). But hold on, there are taxes too. New build? Brace for 21% VAT. Not new? You pay the property transfer tax (ITP), which is 10%, though in our case it was 5%, since we were both 27.

And then there are the notary fees, which usually come to somewhere around... five thousand euros, depending on the notary and the rest. So, best case, you need roughly 25% of the price in your pocket, plus whatever the paperwork costs.

An absolute rip-off.

Once you've convinced a bank that you're financially sound (sounds easy, but believe me, they know everything about you), it's time to pick your mortgage: variable or fixed rate?

That's exactly what popped into your head, and you know it.

For what it's worth, fixed rate is almost always the safer bet: when the Euribor and all that nonsense spikes, you won't lose a wink of sleep, because you'll always pay the same. As for the interest itself, it depends entirely on when you sign. We landed 2.5%, but there are people who, in the good times, snagged 0.5%.

After all that, if your bank contact gives you the green light and says the mortgage is yours, they'll tell you it's time for the notary. You actually get to choose your own, though they rarely mention it. If you know one, you can bring them in for the signing.

Before the signing, you'll visit the notary a few days early (by appointment) for an "exam." Don't panic, it makes sense. Let me explain.

The notary walks you through the contract clause by clause, in painstaking detail, and you'd better pay attention so you actually understand what you're getting into. Afterward, you answer a set of questions to prove you've understood it and that you're of sound enough mind to go through with it.

Then comes signing day. You'll spend a good two hours with the notary, the banker, the estate agent (if there is one), and the seller. This is when you double-check every personal detail on the contract: names, ID numbers, dates, the property address, all of it.

It drags on, but once everything checks out, all parties sign.

And that's it. You own a flat. Congratulations!

...or not.

I'm kidding, the flat really is yours now. Glance at your bank account and you'll see the property's value land, then vanish an instant later as you pay for it. They hand you the keys, everyone shakes hands, and off you go.

Then, deed copy in hand, you rush over to admire your brand-new flat. You start inspecting it more closely... and that's when you notice the problems.

I'm not saying this to put you off, it's just the reality. In my case, I had nobody to advise me and didn't know the half of it, so I discovered I had to gut the kitchen because it was falling apart, all because I hadn't looked inside the cupboards. Ten grand up in smoke on furniture and appliances. Easy to say, right after the enormous investment you've just made.

And hang on, because now you have to furnish the place, since you're probably missing furniture. And maybe you want to repaint. And maybe you want to put a bullet through your own head. Anything's possible. 🙂

All that said, I have to admit I'm genuinely happy with my flat now that the renovations are done, and I finally feel like I own something that's truly mine... and the bank's, for a while.

But it's mine, damn it.

Hope this little guide helps! Cheers!